i want to go home!

Sunday has rolled round again

And here I am alone AgainI’m sure someone will ring again

On the telephoneAgain

What a strange lonely little World it is

I feel all in a tizzIn a panamdemicMy eyes all a mist

How did I get here In Shrewsbury alone Oh dear!

Polly and Katy snufflingFor their breakfast and treats

 I’m furraging for my weetabix 

And wish that I could seeAgainJust a wee bit   

How life changes very quick

I really don’t like this much at all Again

I wish I was by the sea Little old me

With my Guide dog Polly And Katy cat

Evidently I repeat myselfBut people just don’t listen you see

I say things again and again

And they just buzz off home to tea

Whilst I’m left here with Katy cat

and Polly doodle

What a noodle

 Self distancing the biscuit tin

So I can stay thin

But this is awful beyond words

 I don’t care what you say

How many calls you make to me I can’t stand this mist

It really is the pits It is time to call it a day ….

 I really have to say …

Let’s paddle in the sea

You and me Have a cup of tea

Icecream chocolate yes that’s nice

That is my kind of Ice

I’ll try and smile

I’ll try and grin

But that mask I will put in the bin

When you have turned your head away…

i want to go home to a my house in Prittlewell, it had a shop across the road, and one near by, the eye hospital was handy, the drs and dentist to walk to, my neighbours would look out for me and my ways, i had a key safe in the house, no grass to cut, my brother could come and stay when ever he wanted and me with him. i was near london to see the boys if they wanted to stay with me My friends, long standing friends, Denise, Rowena, Jill, Rachel, Laura, street life gang all the things i did, art ministry, church walks, beecroft round the corner, prittlewell park, cinema, shops station, bus stop everything i needed was there…

so i need to go back and get it all back, and register with social services and they will give me the key safe and find a house yes or flat near there again that is what i need to do…

homesick

Today I feel so homesick

I want to be
Home
By the sea
To hear the gentle waves
Lap upon the shore
To feel sand between my toes
Once more
To see my brother
See my friends smile
And eat icecream
And ponder for a while
Where I belong
Familiar ground to be
By the sea
So take me home
Where I was born
I just feel So forlorn
On my own
No true love
Me mum and dad in heaven above
My sons so far away
My daughter round the corner
To help me I must say
But I want to be free
And see once again
My home it is by the sea
That’s where I want to be

Keep Paddling

when i was little
i love puddles
lots of fun
lots of cuddles
with me mum
with me dad
lots of laughter to be had
as i grew the rain did fall
but i had an umbrella after all
when rain drops fell
i would put it up high
to dispel all those raindrops from the sky
life got tougher
i began to swim
dont know how much i could take in
head above water
is what i should do
i really had a difficult view
could just swim it was a task
and there were lots of questions to be asked
life once simple turned quite hard it seemed
and i wading up to my chin
and was doomed it deemed
no hope to glean
but upstream fast i kept paddling
with my heart beating fast it was all quite madding
water has got deeper day by day
and i know it will level out one day
as life goes on the stream can run faster
it will be ok
or a perfect disaster
i have to say
i think i will find my peace quite soon
as i step in the puddle
and remember the cuddle
from me mum and me dad
so much fun to be had
in the future it seems
bright lights in sight
so will swim to them with all my might

let me be

let me be

 

who i want to be

who i used to be

happy busy creative

no anxiety happiness

loneliness is here

take it away from me

let me be loved

let me care

my family around me

let me be happy

independent

free

 

 

Isolation

Another day in isolation

There surely is no consolation
For this sorry state of affairs
A virus that has no cares
Ripping though the World
Taking all it’s gold
But leaving this earth
So much better for it’s worth
Now I sit here alone
Some one will surely phone
But it’s company I seek
I am starting to feel weak
And a bonus I do have here
It’s rotten and oh dear
Glaucoma in my eyes
I just want to panic if not cry
Is life cruel enough it seems not
I never have forgot
All the good times I have had
Before this made me sad
So pandemic take a runner
Glaucoma you’re a bummer
Give me a flipping break
Before it is too late!
How strong do I have to be
Goodness sake give me a cuppa tea!
Lets watch Bake Off on TV
Have some normality!

 

V E DAY 8th May 75 years second world war and my birthday pendamic and white mist over eyes

well it is 75 years since the end of World War two.  And we have the pandemic, i am liviing in Shrewsbury near my daughter for just over a year.  It is my birthday! feels very strange with the bonus of having Advanced glaucoma and my vision is an awful mist, it has got worse since the beginning of the penadamic, for some reason, it is awful , i have had a good cry what else can you do sitting here on your own and losing your eyesight no husband, no family around living on your own going blind, it feels dreadful and i feel out of my depth for sure, please God show me the way to go… i have had some lovely presents and cards and well wishes from friends and family today for my birthday

at the same time a great big white mist of glaucoma is coming down on my eyes, it is awful to be sure and am struggling beyond belief with it, it is so unfair, i have this lovely bungalow, good people around me, my daughter , to do good things with and i have to come to terms with being blind… it is a hard cross to bear, i am trying to contact the hospital at the same time as trying to think it is my birthday today!

white mist over eyes is awful awful awful awful …….

Hockley Home Town

A little dream

That will come true
Is that I will come home to you
My home in Hockley where I belong
Where I was born
And sang my song
I went away and then returned
My family had a lovely time
We sang a rhyme
Some days were sad
And some were mad
 But we sang a tune
And had life
Some strife
I fled in pain
But realise again
It is my home
Where I belong
To end my days
With my final song